Winter Wheel Chair Extravaganza

John and Jake drunk with a wheelchair... And Gorilla Mask!!

Death Chair

RESULTS: Death Jam V 1.01

In a stunning turn of events, the lone man who simply cannot balance on two wheels like the rest of the competition put forth a decisive set of victories to claim the title of Death Chair Champion of the World from the first bi-weekly Death Jam, sponsored by The Sentinel.

Eli Francovich, who spent a week in a wheelchair before penning his short memoir for The Sentinel, eclipsed the coveted 40-second barrier in his third and final time trial for the Death Chair circuit. Essentially a competition with just himself, where the only true victory was in beating his own record set from the previous lap, Francovich easily ran away with the title.

Scores, as follows, from the rest of competition.

First Place

ELI FRANCOVICH

Lap 1: 41.64

Lap 2: 40.68

Lap 3: 38.62

Average Lap: 40.31

Total Time: 120.94

Second Place

DAVID HUMPHREYS 

Lap 1: 51.67

Lap 2: 42.41 

Lap 3: 40.20 

Average Lap: 44.76

Total Time:  134.28

Third Place

NIK BJURSTROM

Lap 1: 49.64

Lap 2: 50.36 

Lap 3: 41.26

Average Lap: 47.09

Total Time: 141.26

Fourth Place

JAKE DONAHUE

Lap 1: 46.78

Lap 2: 45.56

Lap 3: 49.63

Average Lap: 47.32

Total Time: 141.97

Fifth Place

JOHN MONNIER

Lap 1: 47.66

Lap 2: 47.85

Lap 3: 47.85 (DNP)

Average Lap: 47.79

Total Time: 143.36

Eli: Personal Reflection

The concept of Death Chair isn't hard to grasp. At least in theory. But once you have tasted the sweetness of a Death Chair victory there is no turning back. It rivals all other sports both in terms of athleticism, concentration and ballsyness. Anyone who has seriously competed knows that it may seem simple but is far from it. Like chess Death Chair requires that you are always thinking five moves ahead. Like football it requires team unity and and constant training. And finally, like partner ice-skating it requires a finesse and gracefullness that only a true athlete can understand.

At first I was nervous. Wheel chair racing is similar to chariot racing in terms of physical danger and stamina, however, after my first race, which I won, I was hooked.

To the average person it looks crazy, lame or perhaps even stupid. Yet, I know, as does anyone who has ever competed in a Death Chair race, that it is the single most exhilarating thing a human can do. It is funner than alcohol, drugs and sex... combined. Simply put it is
DEATH CHAIR